A Scary Night

Whew! I made it through a very scary night.

They say your blood pressure increases at night and is lowered by morning. Well I hate to think of what mine was as I lay there thinking someone had reached a hand in my chest and began to manually pump and squeeze my heart. Coupled by the lack of breathing and the tremors and spasms in my legs I thought I was going to have some sort of seizure. I didn't know what was going on with me and I was afraid to look, almost the same feeling one would knowing they were abut to get hit. So I lie there with my eyes closed extremely tight and just focusing on making it go away with my meditation. Side note: for those of you who don't know I started meditating my way out of migraines years ago and have found this tool useful throughout my life.

I checked my blood pressure when I first climbed into bed and it was 170/110 - not very good and considered by some to be borderline stroke level. Last time it was this high the docs made me lay down and kept retaking it till they finally handed me a pill and told me to take it immediately. So I promptly laid down and began to try to breathe my way out of it. Not sure that I was successful since it began to follow me in my dreams as I entered a conscious dream-like state.

And still this morning I feel this imaginary person squeezing the life out of my heart and compressing my lungs. Only another 6 days of no pills...yikes! I'm a bit terrified.

And you thought your dreams were scary, at least you can wake up!