4 More Days

It's four more days until surgery and I'm beginning to get nervous. I guess that is an understatement since I haven't slept since I got the date. I mean I guess anyone would be nervous going through all this for so long and then finally getting to a point of treatment. I had my pre-op this morning and that went ok. They once again sucked out my blood and tested my urine and then interviewed me to make sure I knew what was happening and that I was sane.

Tomorrow I get my hair done and Wednesday I need to go back to the thoracic surgeon to check my wounds as they are leaking some strange fluid and blood...almost like huge blood blisters...scary. Thursday my mom is coming and Friday is D-Day...yikes!

Right now I am just surrounding myself with supportive people and trying to not be so nervous but I think I'm failing miserably. It would be easier though if those who doubt the seriousness of this surgery would butt out completely. I'm not even sure I'll let them in after my surgery if they show up...I don't need that type of person around me right now. It may sound selfish but this has to be about me and me getting through all this right now...not about proving I'm sick or anything else!

Ok, off to meditate...